Spent the morning with the New Jersey Remax folks. As everyone knows, the real estate market has been challenging for the last couple years, no exception in Jersey. One gal at break told me how hard it was when in one week she had three closings that went south. Apparently, the clients bailed. Bad week. That had her in a funk that lasted a long time, she said. How many of you can relate? Tough economy, tough times for many.

I was reminded of when I was working with a resort group and we were talking about the whole notion that we adults often have this “I’ll be happy when…” thing going on. I asked the audience to fill in the blank “I’ll be happy when…” A particular disgruntled front desk employee volunteered, “I’ll be happy when I make more money.” He was pretty bold, considering his boss was in the room. Can you absolutely know you will be happier when you make more money, i asked. “Yes indeed”, he replied. So we playfully looked at, “I’ll be happy when I make more money guy”, greeting folks as they come to the resort, walking around interacting with others with the constant thought, I’ll be happier some other time. Then I acted out “happy guy”, doing the same job, but genuinely grateful, energetic and happy. Everyone in the audience could see the difference including the young man.

Then I asked him, Who do you think will get a raise sooner? “Happy guy” or “I’ll be happy when i make more money” guy?

Kids operate from a general disposition of “happy”. So I offered to them the possibility that maybe getting rich won’t make you happy, but perhaps being happy might make you rich.

The other example it reminded me of was when my Son Charles and his flag football team upset a tough team at their semi-finals. They played their hearts out. They were jubulient after the game. Two hours later, they were in the finals, again playing one of the best games ever. They didn’t hold back, came together as a team, gave it their all…. and they lost.

They were obviously bummed out and you could tell. Leonard, their twenty-something coach told them something I hope they won’t ever forget. He said, its one thing to win. But it’s more important to be a good loser. He asked if everyone had given it their all. They all said yes. Then that should make you proud, that should make you want to keep improving, he said. Sometimes you’ll win, and sometimes you’ll lose, thats life, but if you can learn to be a good loser, you will go much farther, be much happier.

If your organization could use a shot of humor from a seasoned business speaker, please contact us and we’ll put together a plan!